Search This Blog

Tuesday, June 7

A prophet

the world is going in a bad direction, no news to most of you... maybe we should pay more attention.

speaking for myself...

i find that seminary is a very good place to hide, from the world, from my family, from god... and it seems people on the outside give me too much credit, "he's at a seminary he must be good," sadly a lot of people are easily deceived. I'm no better than i once was, or so it seems to me. everyone else might see a smart kid with a good head on his shoulders, but they haven't seen my grades, noticed that i've thrown away years of my life... stolen more than i could ever repay. I'm not even in a bad place, i just know where i stand... on Jordan's stormy banks, needing a butt load of grace. I'm not even to the sink or swim part of the journey, I'm waiting... why am i waiting? god only knows, i wish he would speak up...

in the words of crowder... "i wish you'd remember where you set me down"

i've got a lot of christian friends, but just like me, the world wouldn't know that most of them are christians... they brag about it, but they aren't transparent, their christianity isn't noticeable, so were climbing into the same boat, only to end up, adrift and barely floating, in an ever more turbulent sea.

my situation in life has been changing and hopefully that will even me out, but its going to take time... i've also been very alone lately, partly due to being at work a lot, and partly due to the fact that the people in my life are pairing off. it's not a new thing, but it's still hard to deal with.

aside from all that, and shift direction off of me... i feel that the world is encouraging us to be less "separate" and to "corrupt" ourselves a little in order to better fit in. we wear scandalous (from the greek meaning causing to stumble) clothing, we tell clever lies, we cheer at other peoples pain. all while sitting in undeserved, unprecedented, and just plain bad for us, comfort. we use words that would make sailors blush, just to pass the time, and we sell ourselves little by little to whomever wants to satisfy us at this moment.

i ask you, who wants to drink water with "a little" rat poison in it? nobody, if we are offering a dim light to a world, nation, city, town, neighborhood, or community that is lost in the dark, what good are we. less of me is more of jesus, and I'm all about me.

as a people, we need to burn off that desire of "self" in His presence. maybe then we can shine like Him, even if it is just a reflection.

we've turned the wrong way, God is bigger than us, not the other way around. we need to prioritize, we should have to make time for ourselves because He is our life; our day to day. Not the other way around. Focus is not just a ford model, its what we need, and it needs to be on Him.

i don't like to preach, but a prophet is needed, and i don't see one out there.



  1. Dude, you are totally right about the transparency issue. I noticed many things that I did learn in seminary and others I would not wish on my own worst enemy. One of the key things you point out is being a light and our light is dim. We are focused on the self because I believe we never truly "surrender" our garbage at the feet of Jesus. It is a continual process but we barely even start getting our stuff before God. We learn how to use "mask" as our smokescreen or we have so much junk, we are afraid to be open with other Christians because of the judgment we might face. Many times we do not "carry one another's burdens" or "sharpen one another" because we have become apathetic, beat down, or have a despondency about our walk with Christ. I have found that you have to find some "real" friends (brothers) that will lovingly listen to you, rebuke you if need be, and see the issues you are facing. We have this model of "edifying and building up one another" in God's Word but this is hardly fleshed out into a real and honest practice within the Body of Christ. I have been blessed with a handful of men that I am able to do this with, even though it is done over the phone these days. Lastly, we are blurring the lines as you stated above. We are called to be in the world but not of it. I always ask myself and others a question about certain things in their life that seem sketchy: Have you asked Jesus about it? The response is always the same, heated. Maybe this makes some mad but I am just being honest with myself and others.

  2. (continued)
    We have become so busy, lazy, and lethargic in our quiet times, that we never allow the Lord to pinpoint these things in our life the keep us from reflecting God's truth and love. I am as guilty as anyone but when I do spend those intimate time with God through prayer and devotion, I am changed by God's grace and mercy to engage people with the truth of God and the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I keep learning and owning up to my stuff with Christ everyday.